Monday, February 28, 2011
Bye FB World.
So, I deleted my Facebook. I'm making room for the more important things in my life. I'm making more time to read my Bible, more time for Jesus, and more time to enjoy the company of those around me instead of online relationships with friends who live across the country. Facebook is really just a cheap way of keeping up with people. I'd rather actually make an effort and take time out of my busy day to catch up over the phone and hear about what's going on in the lives of my friends. Basically, I'm just tired of spending hours looking at a dumb website that only makes me anxious... I'm not kidding about the anxious part. Deleting my FB has been the most liberating thing I've done in awhile. I'll update my blog regularly, but if you really want to know what's going on in my life and not just what you've creeped on through FB... pick up the phone and give me a ring-a-ling :)
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Today, I'm thankful for a God that knows everything about me - my needs, worries, joys, fears, the list goes on & on - but loves me enough to want to hear it from me. I'm thankful that the Lord will never disappoint or let me down. I'm thankful that the Lord's promises are true when others' promises are not. I'm thankful that He is always by my side when there is no one else standing next to me.
Friday, February 18, 2011
Walk with my Grand Daddy.
I'm so glad I got to go home to be with my family and to go to Pop-Pop's viewing that was just for our immediate family. The funeral service for everyone is later this week and I wish I could be there, but I'm so thankful that I even got to go home (even if it was just for a night). My Pop-Pop will be missed dearly. Of course I love all my grandparents, but Pop-Pop has an extra special place in my heart and I know my brothers & cousins would agree with me. He was a Corporal in the Army... he served in the Korean War. My Pop-Pop had a bunch of odd jobs including a crossing guard. He absolutely loved the Mummers, the Phillies, and Eagles, like any good ole Philly man. As much as he loved watching sports, he enjoyed playing sports as well. He played third base in the "Over the Hill Softball League" until he was 69 years old and won the championship twice while on the team. My Pop-Pop looooved cigars. That was probably his trademark. I remember when I used to go to the store with him just to get cigars. My fondest memories of him were probably the days when he used to watch my brothers and I or just be over spending time with us. He was serious about his dinner time. He didn't like fooling around at the dinner table. I remember on multiple occasions when my brothers and I would start giggling at the table and he told us to settle down and eat, but we just kept laughing for no reason. Sorry Pop-Pop! I just love and am going to miss so many little silly things about him... 
like the fact that he hid stashes of candy in his room so people couldn't take them or the crazy stories he told us about the crazy old people who lived in the same building as him when we would visit him and his silly sense of humor. I'm going to miss hearing about Bingo or whatever game he played that day and how he won 50 cents playing. I'm going to miss the way he told me he was proud of me when I told him about school, the high fives and hugs he used to give me, and the way he told me he loves me. I just found the card he gave me for Christmas, which is now hanging in my room at school. It says, "Granddaughter, you are loved and have been since the day you were born. Believe it and never, ever forget it. Merry Christmas. Love, G-Pop xo." I found this in my room at just the right moment and honestly believe that he let me find it at that moment. I know it was him reminding me that even though he's not with me physically right now, he loves me and always will. I love you too, Pop-Pop. Always and forever.
like the fact that he hid stashes of candy in his room so people couldn't take them or the crazy stories he told us about the crazy old people who lived in the same building as him when we would visit him and his silly sense of humor. I'm going to miss hearing about Bingo or whatever game he played that day and how he won 50 cents playing. I'm going to miss the way he told me he was proud of me when I told him about school, the high fives and hugs he used to give me, and the way he told me he loves me. I just found the card he gave me for Christmas, which is now hanging in my room at school. It says, "Granddaughter, you are loved and have been since the day you were born. Believe it and never, ever forget it. Merry Christmas. Love, G-Pop xo." I found this in my room at just the right moment and honestly believe that he let me find it at that moment. I know it was him reminding me that even though he's not with me physically right now, he loves me and always will. I love you too, Pop-Pop. Always and forever."When I get where I'm going, I'm gonna walk with my Grand Daddy and he'll match me step for step. And I'll tell him how I missed him every minute since he left and then I'll hug his neck."
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Pop-Pop
My Pop-Pop is one of my favorite guys in the world. He's funny, kind, goofy, gentle, and sooo loving. He never fails to put a smile on my face. He's a die-hard Phillies and Eagles fan. He never misses a game and always sports his Phillies hat. I just love so many little silly things about him... like the fact that he hides stashes of candy in his room so people can't take them or the crazy stories he tells us when we visit him about the crazy old people who live in the same building as him and his silly sarcastic personality. I love the way he tells me he's proud of me when I tell him about school, the high fives and hugs he gives me, and the way he tells me he loves me.
I wish I could be with him and my family more than anything in the world right now. See, my Pop has been pretty sick off and on, in and out of rehabilitation centers, and in our hospital's assisted living home for a few years now. My mom called me earlier this week to let me know that he was admitted to the hospital with an infection and a few minutes ago my dad called me to let me know that it's not looking like he will make it through the night. My heart is hurting and I long to be with him tonight. He's been a big part of my life for twenty years and it's hard to imagine it without him.
I wish I could be with him and my family more than anything in the world right now. See, my Pop has been pretty sick off and on, in and out of rehabilitation centers, and in our hospital's assisted living home for a few years now. My mom called me earlier this week to let me know that he was admitted to the hospital with an infection and a few minutes ago my dad called me to let me know that it's not looking like he will make it through the night. My heart is hurting and I long to be with him tonight. He's been a big part of my life for twenty years and it's hard to imagine it without him.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Homegirl.
Meet: two of the goofiest girls ever. Actually, I lied. Let me rephrase that... Meet: the goofiest girl you will ever meet, my co-leader, Megan. I met Megan during our first year Bible study, but didn't really get to know her until I joined leadership last semester and let me tell you, this girl is freaking hilarious. Everything that comes out of this girl's mouth is so freaking hysterical (you know, the doubled over because your stomach hurts so much from laughing and in tears kind of funny) and kind of outlandish. She needs a standup comedy show or a reality TV show. I wish I could follow her around alldayeveryday or just be able to jump in her head to hear her thoughts. One time, she fell off her chair in lab in front of everyone and the first thing that came to her mind to say to everyone when she got back up was, "I took five naps yesterday so I don't know why I just fell".... um, what?! Hahaha
. I've been told on multiple occasions that Megan and I just need to travel and do program together at camp because the way we interact is apparently really comical. I don't know what it is about Megan, but when we're together a whole different side of me comes out. A goofier, unreserved, quirky, vulnerable side of me, which is a side of me that I don't let many people see. Maybe it's because she's not afraid to put herself out there, she's not afraid to take risks, and she's able to make a fool out of herself in the name of Jesus.
That's the side of me that comes out when I'm around her and I just love that I love being on College Life leadership with her! She brings so, so, so much creativity to the group! Club would not be the same without her. She comes up with the most creative and original skits and games, and executes them with perfection. She knows how to draw the room together at club and knows how to get everyone so excited about the silly games we're playing. Along with being in funny skits and leading club with Megan, I'm also leading Campaginers with her and one of our other co-leaders. What a joy that has been!! Megan is so full of knowledge and wisdom (more than you know gfriend!) that I wish I had. 
She has so much more figured out than me about what it means to be walking with Jesus every single day. And she has a transparency & vulnerability about her that allows others to feel so comfortable about sharing whatever is going on in their lives. I love that about her! She's not afraid to put herself out there in front of people and is not afraid of being wrong when she does. So many times I hold back from sharing my thoughts on life and being in relationship with the Lord because I'm so afraid that I will sound dumb or that no one will be able to relate to what I'm saying, but Megan is not afraid of that. That boldness in her is something I admire and I know the Lord is using Megan to help me recognize that boldness in myself. The thing that I admire most about Megan is that her love for the Lord and others is so easily recognizable in her everyday life. Her love for the Lord
and passion for ministry is so evident in her life. You can tell by how excited she gets when we plan Club and talk about YL just how much she wants to meet people where they are, and wants to share with them the greatest news of all: that they are loved unconditionally and infinitely by the God of the universe. She is always giving thanks and pointing to the One who deserves the praise in every situation in her life. Homegirl is the least selfish person I know and would do just about anything for her friends. She challenges me to seek the Lord more and more each day and reminds me by her actions & words to love others just as Jesus does. She has one of the biggest and most beautiful hearts I know. You are loved by not only myself and so many other people, but most importantly you are loved unconditionally by the Lord. I'm glad we're part of this ministry together and can't wait to see how the Lord uses us (well, we know you'll be the future area director ha) in High Point. Marinade in that!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Beloved
“Aren’t you, like me hoping that some person, thing or event will come along to give you that final feeling of inner well-being you desire? Don’t you often hope: “May this book, idea, course, trip, job, country or relationship fulfill my deepest desire.” But as long as you are waiting for that mysterious moment you will go on running helter-skelter, always anxious and restless, always lustful and angry, never fully satisfied. You know that this is the compulsiveness that keeps us going and busy, but at the same time makes us wonder whether we are getting anywhere in the long run. This is the way to spiritual exhaustion and burn-out. This is the way to spiritual death.
Well, you and I don’t have to kill ourselves. We are the Beloved. We are intimately loved long before our parents, teachers, spouses, children, and friends loved or wounded us. That’s the truth spoken by the voice that says, “You are my Beloved.”
Listening to that voice with great inner attentiveness, I hear words that say: “I have called you by name, from the very beginning. You are mine and I am yours. You are my Beloved, on you my favor rests. I have molded you in the depths of the earth and knitted you together in your mother’s womb. I have carved you in the palms of my hands and hidden you in the shadow of my embrace. I look at you with infinite tenderness and care for you with a care more intimate than that of a mother for a child. I have counted every hair on your head and guided you at every step. Wherever you go, I go with you, and wherever you rest, I keep watch. I will give you food that will satisfy all your hunger and drink that will quench your thirst. I will not hide my face from you. You know me as your own and I know you as my own. You belong to me… wherever you are I will be. Nothing will ever separate us. We are one.”
-Henri Nouwen, Life of the Beloved
Your love.
i love your love,
your selfless-give-up-all-you’ve-got kind of love,
your love that makes me laugh-out-loud-and-smile-for-hours kind of love,
your love that makes me want to scream, shout for joy, cry for mercy, beg for forgiveness,
your ironic love, your challenging love, your timeless love,
your harsh-kick-me-in-the-butt kind of love,
your make-me-more-like-you kind of love,
your blunt love, your warm embracing love, your patient love, your jealous love
your lush-oozing-from-seems-heart kind of love,
your big bear hug love, your gentle love, your living love, your love for me,
your love that created a stunning world for us to dwell in,
your humbling love, your never ending love, your arms wide open love,
your love that loves my broken life,
your beautiful love.
(Shout out to Kelsey Burns).
“I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saint, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge- that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”
— Ephesians 3:16-19
All aboard the love train.
According to my goofy, but brilliant Contemporary Christian Theology professor, evil is “our soul’s refusal to get on board the love train.” hahaha. I think my Big and I were the only ones who laughed.
Come to my rescue
“You are the source of life and I can’t be left behind. No one else will do. I will take hold of You.
I need You Jesus to come to my rescue. Where else can I go? There’s no other name by which I am saved. Capture me with grace. I will follow You.
This world has nothing for me, I will follow You. This world has nothing for me, I will follow You.”
To-do
My to-do list for this weekend includes the following:
- Call George back
- Call Dana back
- Call Kelsey back
- Call Lindsay back
- Call Micaela back
- Call Marissa back
- Call Nikki back
Finally skype with Bryce after weeks of telling him I will
I just listened to my voicemails and thought, “Shootydoo, I have not called any of these people back”… Clearly, I’m terrible at returning phone calls/keeping up with people.
“If Christians are truly willing to leave everything to follow Him, then they will, in fact, eventually leave everything. Either voluntarily or involuntarily, either by design or by accident, a day will come when they realize they have only Jesus. If He alone is savior, then we can find our lives only in being His disciples.”
Give me Jesus
“In the morning when I rise, give me Jesus. You can have all this world, just give me Jesus.”
Grace
Today, I’m thankful for forgiveness. I’m thankful that the Lord loves me just the way I am, but loves me too much to leave me that way. I’m thankful that He is reshaping my life to look more like Him.
All to Jesus I surrender. All to Him I freely give. I will ever love and trust Him. In His presence daily live.
I surrender all, I surrender all. All to Thee, my blessed Savior. I surrender all.
All to Jesus I surrender. Humbly at His feet I bow. Worldly pleasures all forsaken. Take me Jesus, take me now.
I surrender all, I surrender all. All to Thee, my blessed Savior. I surrender all.
All to Jesus I surrender. Lord, I give myself to Thee. So fill me with Thy love and power. Let Thy blessing fall on me.
This is the song my heart sings today and everyday! Completely captivated by who You are this morning. I want nothing more than to surrender everything - my fears, my worries, my insecurities, my dreams, my plans, my life - to You and sit in Your presence.
Made more faithful
Learning to accept the Lord’s will for me even though it’s not what I planned for myself. His plans are better than mine, His timing is perfect, and His promises are true.
Every girl, young and old, has to face her own reflection. Twirl around, stare it down, what’s the mirror gonna say? With some luck, you’ll measure up, but you might not hold a candle to the rest. “Is that your best?” says the mirror to the mess, but there’s a whisper in the noise. Can you hear a little voice? And He says,
“Has anybody told you you’re beautiful? You might agree if you could see what I see. Cause everything about you is incredible. You should have seen me smile the day that I made you beautiful for Me.”
If it’s true beauty that lies in the eye of the beholder, what my life and what’s inside to give Him something to behold. I want a heart that’s captivating. I want to hear my Father say:
“Has anybody told you you’re beautiful? You might agree if you could see what I see. Cause everything about you is incredible. You should have seen me smile the day that I made you beautiful for Me. Close your eyes, look inside, let Me see the you that you’ve been trying to hide. Long ago, I made you so very beautiful, so I ought to know you’re beautiful.”
Always be joyful!
“Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” [1 Thessalonians 5:16-18]
Joy is what we feel when we know we are loved unconditionally and infinitely by the God of the universe. Being happy is not the same as being joyful… sadness, disappointment, brokenness, and joy can coexist. Joy is what fills us when we know that nothing - absolutely NOTHING - can take away or separate us from the love of the Lord… and as we become more aware of this love, we allow our hearts to become more joyful and a source of joy for others.
“My friend’s joy is contagious. The more I am with him, the more I catch glimpses of the sun shining through the clouds. Yes, I know there is a sun, even though the skies are covered with clouds. While my friend always spoke about the sun, I kept speaking about the clouds, until one day I realized that it was the sun that allowed me to see the clouds.” -Henri Nouwen, Here and Now
I miss my dear friend Brittany very much. Tonight especially. I was just thinking about her, as I do everyday. I can’t even begin to describe the amazing person she was. So full of life and whenever I think about all the time we spent together, I can still hear her laugh and it puts a smile on my face. I loved the times we just drove around our town for hours listening to the same Run Kid Run song over and over (I made her replay it) because there was nothing better to do on a Friday night or when we would sit for hours and talk at our favorite coffee shop called Stir It Up. Or the times we would just sit around at my house doing absolutely nothing, but we’d still have the best time ever because we were together and the hot tub nights at our friend Jocelyn’s house. It’s so weird to think about how a few weeks before she left us, we were texting each other and making plans to hang out. I guess I didn’t realize just how sick she was and she just had the most positive attitude always believing that she would get better.
Here’s one of her posts from her blog that I just love because her personality is all over it: ”i read about how you touched them and they were healed; or even if someone just touched your cloak, they were forever changed. you let a broken woman bathe your feet in her tears, and you washed your best friends’ feet. i’m just wondering though - did you ever just HUG people? i know it’s a silly question and all; i’m sure you would have (why wouldn’t you have?), but it’s one of those things that was never mentioned. and it got me thinking about it and how whenever there was a touch from you, sins were forgiven and sickness fell. all i really need is a hug. that’s okay for me to imagine, right? that’s not conflicting with any sort of theology, is it? okay good. then hug me. but not one of these sideways one-arm-around-the-neck type hugs. or the ghetto right-hand, clasp-fists, elbows-to-chest, pat-pat-on-the-backback. or the you put your right arm-over my left arm-and i put my right arm under your left arm and we make this weird SORT-of-diagonal thing. naw.. none of those! BEAR HUG ME, MAN! take your old school carpenter arms and throw them around my upper body leaving my arms dangling underneath yours somewhere, and i can barely move them because you’re squeezing me so hard. (but don’t pick me up and make my back pop because I HATE it when people do that) and then hold me. hold me here in your arms.”
I miss Brittany for the selfish reason that she is not here with me anymore, but I know she is living the best life ever with her Father. I can’t even begin to imagine all she’s experienced and continues to experience, and I just know that she has gotten that hug she wanted :) “So instead I’ll pray with every tear and be thankful for the time I had you here.”
Wonderful Maker
“What a wonderful Maker. What a wonderful Savior. How majestic Your whispers and how humble Your love. With the strength like no other and the heart of a father. How majestic Your whispers. What a wonderful God. No eye has fully seen how beautiful the cross and we have only heard the faintest whispers of how great You are. You made the world and saw that it was good. You sent Your only Son, for You are good.”
Just in case you were wondering
Tic Tacs have 1.9 calories in them.
I got my Dean’s List letter yesterday. I found one thing I’m good at, being a nerd. Too school for cool.
I really would love a strawberry banana smoothie right now, but only from Smoothie King.
I wish I knew everything there is to know about aviation. I’m fascinated by it. I want to be a pilot, but I really wish I was smart enough to be an engineer. I want to make them fly and I want to know EVERYTHING about them. I love taking off on the runway… I just feel free. I don’t know if that’s weird or not, but I’m fascinated and I love it.
In 12 days I will be 20 years old. I’ll be halfway to 40.
Thanks to some of my good friends (the lovely Ashley Berg, Dana Sabato, Kelsey Burns, Nicole Kortendick, and Megan Liss), ever since our conversation at dinner about weddings, I have been thinking about them nonstop. And it probably doesn’t help that one of my really great friends is getting married in April and she was just telling me about all the new wedding plans. Gah. Check out the song Marry Me by Train if you haven’t already heard it, it gets me every time.
Being obedient to where the Lord is leading me. What comes next is totally in His hands and I can’t wait for what’s ahead!!! It’s gonna be great :)
Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good spirit lead me on level ground. [Psalm 143: 8 & 10]
“When you feel God’s call to move, allow him to guide you. He will give you the grace to do whatever he has asked.”
Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good spirit lead me on level ground. [Psalm 143: 8 & 10]
“When you feel God’s call to move, allow him to guide you. He will give you the grace to do whatever he has asked.”
We belong to each other
Each day the Lord is teaching me something new about what being in relationship with Him means. Recently, I’ve been learning a lot about prayer, what living in community really is, and their relation to each other. It’s not about always seeing each other and it’s not about being best friends. The closer we become to the Lord through prayer, the closer we can become to our brothers and sisters. God remains in our brothers and sisters just as he remains in us. When we recognize God’s presence in our own hearts, we will also be able to recognize God in the hearts of our brothers and sisters. The same is true if we recognize the demons in ourselves. When we see only demons in ourselves and when we focus on the turmoil in our lives, we are only able to recognize that in others, but when we recognize and see God in ourselves, we are able to see God in others. Prayer is the way we get to know the Father’s heart and when we pray, we enter into His presence. It is not a sign of weakness when we say we need to pray for one another. In fact, it is just the opposite. When we pray for each other we are entering His presence and actively acknowledging that, as children of God, we belong to each other.
Your works are wonderful
There have been recent events and situations that would normally cause destructive thoughts of not being good enough to invade my head again, but in the midst of this chaos, I find myself in a place of peace. The Lord has me in such an amazing place and He is teaching me so much about His love.
It’s taken me a loooong time (like a few years) to finally realize just how beautiful I am and to feel comfortable in my own skin. Sure there are days that I struggle still, but I just keep reminding myself that the Lord made me with such care and He thinks I am absolutely beautiful. I am loved unconditionally by the Creator of the universe and I am falling more in love with Him each day. And I am absolutely captivated by the thought that the Lord calls me His beloved
I am His masterpiece and made in His image. My uniqueness is a gift and I refuse to squeeze myself into a man-made mold. I will not listen to what the world says I should look like and how I should act. I will use my uniqueness and talents given from the Lord to glorify Him and ONLY Him. The Lord will be my mirror and He will reflect back to me my true beauty. I am so COMPLETELY satisfied in the Lord. AH-MAY-ZING.
It’s taken me a loooong time (like a few years) to finally realize just how beautiful I am and to feel comfortable in my own skin. Sure there are days that I struggle still, but I just keep reminding myself that the Lord made me with such care and He thinks I am absolutely beautiful. I am loved unconditionally by the Creator of the universe and I am falling more in love with Him each day. And I am absolutely captivated by the thought that the Lord calls me His beloved
I am His masterpiece and made in His image. My uniqueness is a gift and I refuse to squeeze myself into a man-made mold. I will not listen to what the world says I should look like and how I should act. I will use my uniqueness and talents given from the Lord to glorify Him and ONLY Him. The Lord will be my mirror and He will reflect back to me my true beauty. I am so COMPLETELY satisfied in the Lord. AH-MAY-ZING.
I will follow You forward
I have to say, I really love where I’m at in life. The Lord has me in such a beautifully chaotic place, but He’s teaching me and leading me every step along the way.
I applied to James Madison University back in September for a reason I can’t really explain because I’m not even sure myself, but what I do know is that I’m being called to love the lost through the ministry of Young Life. The YL community is huge at JMU, I think that may be the reason why I applied. So now I’m here trying to figure out where the Lord is leading me. I’ve been so back and fourth between staying at High Point and going to JMU since I found out I was accepted. The Lord has provided for me BIG time this semester while I’ve been here though. He’s provided me with College Life and I LOVE reaching out to my friends through that, and next semester I’m even leading Campaigners with two of my co-leaders. The Lord also blessed me with some amazing relationships with my co-leaders. I love living in community and growing with these people! It’s been such a joy and they’ve pushed me to keep seeking the Lord and to keep pressing in to know the Father’s heart.
Some of y’all might be wondering why I would transfer if the Lord has provided me with so much since I’ve been here…. and up until Saturday I’d be thinking the same exact thing. For some reason, I feel like it’s been on my heart to go to JMU. I don’t think this is just something I’m feeling because I’d love to be at JMU. Ever since I found out I got in, I’ve I wanted to go, but if the Lord didn’t have me there, I was going to stay right here at High Point. It hasn’t felt like JMU was where the Lord was leading me… until now.
Now that it’s becoming more of a possibility, it’s honestly a little scary (okay, maybe BIG time scary). It’s scary because I’m going to be leaving friends who mean the world to me and a place where I’m comfortable, but the Lord doesn’t call us to be comfortable. I know He is going to stretch me and build me up so beautifully through the transition. I just pray that the Lord keeps building me up so I have the courage to do what I feel He is calling me to do and to love those He puts in my life. I want to be able to gladly say “yes!” to go wherever He is leading me and to follow knowing that His plans are better than mine…. it’s just weird to think that I may only have one more semester at High Point.
“Faith never knows where it is being led, but it loves and knows the One who is leading.”
I applied to James Madison University back in September for a reason I can’t really explain because I’m not even sure myself, but what I do know is that I’m being called to love the lost through the ministry of Young Life. The YL community is huge at JMU, I think that may be the reason why I applied. So now I’m here trying to figure out where the Lord is leading me. I’ve been so back and fourth between staying at High Point and going to JMU since I found out I was accepted. The Lord has provided for me BIG time this semester while I’ve been here though. He’s provided me with College Life and I LOVE reaching out to my friends through that, and next semester I’m even leading Campaigners with two of my co-leaders. The Lord also blessed me with some amazing relationships with my co-leaders. I love living in community and growing with these people! It’s been such a joy and they’ve pushed me to keep seeking the Lord and to keep pressing in to know the Father’s heart.
Some of y’all might be wondering why I would transfer if the Lord has provided me with so much since I’ve been here…. and up until Saturday I’d be thinking the same exact thing. For some reason, I feel like it’s been on my heart to go to JMU. I don’t think this is just something I’m feeling because I’d love to be at JMU. Ever since I found out I got in, I’ve I wanted to go, but if the Lord didn’t have me there, I was going to stay right here at High Point. It hasn’t felt like JMU was where the Lord was leading me… until now.
Now that it’s becoming more of a possibility, it’s honestly a little scary (okay, maybe BIG time scary). It’s scary because I’m going to be leaving friends who mean the world to me and a place where I’m comfortable, but the Lord doesn’t call us to be comfortable. I know He is going to stretch me and build me up so beautifully through the transition. I just pray that the Lord keeps building me up so I have the courage to do what I feel He is calling me to do and to love those He puts in my life. I want to be able to gladly say “yes!” to go wherever He is leading me and to follow knowing that His plans are better than mine…. it’s just weird to think that I may only have one more semester at High Point.
“Faith never knows where it is being led, but it loves and knows the One who is leading.”
Never alone
There is no such thing as being lonely.
You may feel isolated and separated, but you are not alone.
You may be hurting and broken, but you are not alone.
Your family may be far away and your friends may leave you, but you are not alone.
You are never alone.
“I will never leave you nor forsake you.” [Hebrews 13:5]
Too many times we rely on those around us. We put all our hope, trust, joy, and love in the people we spend most our time with, but what happens when they leave? We become hurt and lonely. It’s something that’s hard to come to terms with. The fact of the matter is, people aren’t perfect. They will let you down. Why do we have to learn this lesson over and over again?
God is going to do whatever He must to get our attention. He wants to be our focus, all the time. He wants all of our love, all the time. He is with us in our heartache. He is with us in our pain. He loves us unconditionally! He loves us better than any friend or family member could ever love us. Friends and family might let us down, but He will never disappoint. And no matter what we’ve done or where we’ve been, He WANTS to love us!
“No love of the natural heart unless the human heart has been satisfied by God first.” -Oswald Chambers.
Truth.
You may feel isolated and separated, but you are not alone.
You may be hurting and broken, but you are not alone.
Your family may be far away and your friends may leave you, but you are not alone.
You are never alone.
“I will never leave you nor forsake you.” [Hebrews 13:5]
Too many times we rely on those around us. We put all our hope, trust, joy, and love in the people we spend most our time with, but what happens when they leave? We become hurt and lonely. It’s something that’s hard to come to terms with. The fact of the matter is, people aren’t perfect. They will let you down. Why do we have to learn this lesson over and over again?
God is going to do whatever He must to get our attention. He wants to be our focus, all the time. He wants all of our love, all the time. He is with us in our heartache. He is with us in our pain. He loves us unconditionally! He loves us better than any friend or family member could ever love us. Friends and family might let us down, but He will never disappoint. And no matter what we’ve done or where we’ve been, He WANTS to love us!
“No love of the natural heart unless the human heart has been satisfied by God first.” -Oswald Chambers.
Truth.
Changed
In Jesus’ name I’ve been changed, I’ve been filled, I’ve been found, I’ve been freed, I’ve been saved. In Jesus’ blood I’ve been loved, I’ve been cleansed, and redeemed, and released, rearranged. But how can I show You that I’m grateful? You’ve been so generous to me. How can I worship more than singing? And live out Redemption’s melody.
I have been blessed – now I want to be a blessing. I have been loved – now I want to bring love. I’ve been invited – I want to share the invitation. I have been changed – to bring change, to bring change.
In Jesus’ name we are changed, we are called, we are chosen, adopted, and named. In Jesus’ blood we are loved, we are healed, we’re forgiven and free of our shame. We want to show You that we’re thankful. Flooding Your world with hope and peace. Help us to worship more than singing giving Redemption hands and feet.
Changed by Aaron Niequist
I have been blessed – now I want to be a blessing. I have been loved – now I want to bring love. I’ve been invited – I want to share the invitation. I have been changed – to bring change, to bring change.
In Jesus’ name we are changed, we are called, we are chosen, adopted, and named. In Jesus’ blood we are loved, we are healed, we’re forgiven and free of our shame. We want to show You that we’re thankful. Flooding Your world with hope and peace. Help us to worship more than singing giving Redemption hands and feet.
Changed by Aaron Niequist
Dana!
A little less than a month til I visit my best friend!
I was blessed to have her with me for a month at camp and now we’re going to be celebrating her birthday and New Years together!! I can’t wait to see this girl :)
There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother. [Proverbs 18:24]
I was blessed to have her with me for a month at camp and now we’re going to be celebrating her birthday and New Years together!! I can’t wait to see this girl :)
There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother. [Proverbs 18:24]
Guard your heart
I’ve been really struggling a lot with my thoughts lately. Thoughts of not being good enough. It seems like recently all my friends have started relationships and well, I haven’t. This has lead to me asking myself daily what is wrong with me and why I’m still by myself. I know this sounds so dumb, but when you’re left by yourself a lot because all your friends are with their boyfriends, it starts to get to you. I was asked to go to a date party with some kid from one of the frats tonight and so I went. I knew this guy was like crushin’ on me hard and so I thought it would be fun. I was right, it was fun, but the Lord was tugging at my heart the whole time I was there. I knew the Lord was telling me not to compromise and not to settle because He has the best things in store for me.
I will not compromise and I will not settle.
I know You have great things in store for me.
I know Your timing is the best and that You only want to give me the best.
I intend to fall madly in love with You and to be completely satisfied in You and no one else.
I intend to sit wrapped in Your arms and be still.
I intend to guard my heart.
But when You do give me someone,
I want you to love the Lord before you love me and pursue me in the most beautiful of ways.
I will not compromise and I will not settle.
I know You have great things in store for me.
I know Your timing is the best and that You only want to give me the best.
I intend to fall madly in love with You and to be completely satisfied in You and no one else.
I intend to sit wrapped in Your arms and be still.
I intend to guard my heart.
But when You do give me someone,
I want you to love the Lord before you love me and pursue me in the most beautiful of ways.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
Dear Lake Champion family,
After posting the Summer Staff video and seeing the comments that were posted about it, I realized that sometimes there are reasons why I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
I was reminded the other day of a conversation we had daily with Ryan and Emma. You know, the one that looked a little something like this: Ryan: “What’s our job?” Us: “To love us.” Ryan: “What’s your job?” Us: “To love each other.”
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
I was at a frozen yogurt bar the other day and they had snickerdoodle froyo. It was delicious. It reminded me of all the cookies I ate after each lunch during my two months at camp (I probably ate more cookies during that time than I have in my entire life) and how I told myself I would never eat another cookie again.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
Whenever I’m listening to iTunes on shuffle, it never fails to play a song that we sang and worshiped the Lord to, heard during club, or heard while we were eating meals and exiting the dining hall. These songs take me back to the sweet time we were standing in a sea of green shirts in Fox Run at the end of the month, holding hands, and praising the Lord for the time of love, fellowship, service, and community we just experienced together.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
We had a “hillbilly” themed club recently to promote our Mountain Madness fall retreat. I wore overalls and a bandana just like I wore each week at camp. As I got dressed and headed over to club, I realized that I was not heading to the rodeo site or the County Fair “field” to blow up insane amounts of balloons or to hand out tickets to campers like I had done so for two months. I was not going to have to move heavy stacks of hay or make cotton candy. And I unfortunately wasn’t going to have to go straight to the swing or zip or pool to work when everyone got out of club.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
After a long day I could always look forward to being refreshed and strengthened by what Emma and Ryan shared with us at our many meetings. We were all there to encourage each other with the Word to keep each other going. The next few weeks between now and finals will be exhausting for me and I’m going to be stretched, but I won’t have yall here next to me to encourage me.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
Tonight there is not a reason why I miss you, I just do. I am sitting here trying (trying being the keyword) to write my Religion paper and my mind keeps drifting off to our sweet time spent together at camp. My heart longs to be with yall and to be frantically running tiki torches out to the front lawn so high school and middle school kids can hear about Jesus and His love for each of them. I miss people snuggling up in my bunk with me at night or when taking nap or setting the fire alarm off because of the ridiculously hot showers we took. I miss Big O preaching to us in the morning before we started our day on the ropes course or closing the day with “touch time” on the waterfront. And as I’m writing this, I’m starting to feel a lump form in my throat as I try to fight the tears from rolling down my cheeks (I’m in the school library, ha).
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
Dear Brothers and Sisters, please know that someone is praying for each of you. I pray that the Lord has been so evident in each of your lives. I pray that He is teaching you, leading you, and drawing you closer to Him every day. Know that someone has been thinking about you and know that you are so loved & dearly missed.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you, but tonight I just do.
After posting the Summer Staff video and seeing the comments that were posted about it, I realized that sometimes there are reasons why I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
I was reminded the other day of a conversation we had daily with Ryan and Emma. You know, the one that looked a little something like this: Ryan: “What’s our job?” Us: “To love us.” Ryan: “What’s your job?” Us: “To love each other.”
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
I was at a frozen yogurt bar the other day and they had snickerdoodle froyo. It was delicious. It reminded me of all the cookies I ate after each lunch during my two months at camp (I probably ate more cookies during that time than I have in my entire life) and how I told myself I would never eat another cookie again.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
Whenever I’m listening to iTunes on shuffle, it never fails to play a song that we sang and worshiped the Lord to, heard during club, or heard while we were eating meals and exiting the dining hall. These songs take me back to the sweet time we were standing in a sea of green shirts in Fox Run at the end of the month, holding hands, and praising the Lord for the time of love, fellowship, service, and community we just experienced together.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
We had a “hillbilly” themed club recently to promote our Mountain Madness fall retreat. I wore overalls and a bandana just like I wore each week at camp. As I got dressed and headed over to club, I realized that I was not heading to the rodeo site or the County Fair “field” to blow up insane amounts of balloons or to hand out tickets to campers like I had done so for two months. I was not going to have to move heavy stacks of hay or make cotton candy. And I unfortunately wasn’t going to have to go straight to the swing or zip or pool to work when everyone got out of club.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
After a long day I could always look forward to being refreshed and strengthened by what Emma and Ryan shared with us at our many meetings. We were all there to encourage each other with the Word to keep each other going. The next few weeks between now and finals will be exhausting for me and I’m going to be stretched, but I won’t have yall here next to me to encourage me.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
Tonight there is not a reason why I miss you, I just do. I am sitting here trying (trying being the keyword) to write my Religion paper and my mind keeps drifting off to our sweet time spent together at camp. My heart longs to be with yall and to be frantically running tiki torches out to the front lawn so high school and middle school kids can hear about Jesus and His love for each of them. I miss people snuggling up in my bunk with me at night or when taking nap or setting the fire alarm off because of the ridiculously hot showers we took. I miss Big O preaching to us in the morning before we started our day on the ropes course or closing the day with “touch time” on the waterfront. And as I’m writing this, I’m starting to feel a lump form in my throat as I try to fight the tears from rolling down my cheeks (I’m in the school library, ha).
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you and sometimes I just miss you.
Dear Brothers and Sisters, please know that someone is praying for each of you. I pray that the Lord has been so evident in each of your lives. I pray that He is teaching you, leading you, and drawing you closer to Him every day. Know that someone has been thinking about you and know that you are so loved & dearly missed.
Sometimes there are reasons I miss you, but tonight I just do.
Happy happy joy joy
My heart is so overwhelmed by the Lord’s love and joy right now! It’s almost too much to handle and my heart just wants to explode :)
Stay
Oh farewell to all these people that I’ve known. Welcome these seeds that have been sown. Yeah, farewell to a place I’ve called home. Yeah, farewell to a time I call strong. And maybe I’m leaving, maybe I’m wrong. Oh, and if I could, I’d make them all come along. Oh, farewell to a place I’ve called home.
And I don’t know why I love this place so much but I wanna stay. And I don’t know why I love these people, but I do and I wanna stay. I do and I wanna stay. I wanna stay.
Yeah, farewell to all these friends. I hope someday we’ll be together again. Yeah, I hope someday I’ll be back here. Yeah, I know someday I’ll be back here.
And I don’t know why I love this place so much but I wanna stay. And I don’t know why I love these people, but I do and I wanna stay. I do and I wanna stay. I wanna stay.
Yeah, I hope someday I’m back. I hope someday I’m back. I hope someday I’m back here.
-Stay by Jake Ousley
I shouldn’t have to tell you who I am
Cause who I am should be speaking for itself.
Cause if I am who I want to be
Then who you see won’t even be me.
Oh, the more and more I disappear,
The more and more He becomes clear.
Til everyone I talk to hears His voice,
And everything I touch feels the warmth of His hand,
Til everyone I meet sees Jesus in me,
This is all I wanna be.
I wanna be mistaken for Jesus, oh, I wanna be mistaken.
Do they only see who we are,
when who we are should be pointing them to Christ?
Cause we are who He chose to use to spread the news
Of the way, the truth, and the life.
Oh, I want all I am to die,
So all He is can come alive.
May He touch with my hands, see through my eyes,
May He speak through my lips, live through my life.
-Mistaken by Warren Barfield.
Cause who I am should be speaking for itself.
Cause if I am who I want to be
Then who you see won’t even be me.
Oh, the more and more I disappear,
The more and more He becomes clear.
Til everyone I talk to hears His voice,
And everything I touch feels the warmth of His hand,
Til everyone I meet sees Jesus in me,
This is all I wanna be.
I wanna be mistaken for Jesus, oh, I wanna be mistaken.
Do they only see who we are,
when who we are should be pointing them to Christ?
Cause we are who He chose to use to spread the news
Of the way, the truth, and the life.
Oh, I want all I am to die,
So all He is can come alive.
May He touch with my hands, see through my eyes,
May He speak through my lips, live through my life.
-Mistaken by Warren Barfield.
Great friends and good times
My weekend at JMU was absolutely blessed and I loved being there. It’s such a beautiful thing when you can see friends you haven’t seen in about 3 months and be able to pick up where you left off. It’s like you haven’t skipped a beat with them.
I think that’s what makes Summer Staff so special and beautiful. A friendship, or any relationship, centered around Christ is so much more fulfilling. I love that even though we haven’t seen each other in what seems to be forever, we were still able to encourage each other. There’s such freedom in friendships like this and being with these friends this past weekend encouraged me in so many ways.
Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another. [Hebrews 10:23-25]
I think that’s what makes Summer Staff so special and beautiful. A friendship, or any relationship, centered around Christ is so much more fulfilling. I love that even though we haven’t seen each other in what seems to be forever, we were still able to encourage each other. There’s such freedom in friendships like this and being with these friends this past weekend encouraged me in so many ways.
Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another. [Hebrews 10:23-25]
Faithfulness
Can I just tell yall that I’m in such awe of how the Lord is working in the lives of those around me and in my own life?!! I wish I could put into words how joyful the Lord makes me everyday and words to describe the love He submerses in everyday!
“You have my heart and I am Yours forever. How beautiful is Your unfailing love.”
I love that I can just pick up the phone or skype to chat with people I haven’t seen in about 3-4 months and pick up where we left off. Even though we’re all home and busy with school, leading, and life, when we talk it’s like we haven’t skipped a beat. We’re still able to share with each other all the things that the Lord is doing in our lives after camp, we’re still able to encourage each other, and we’re still able to pour into each other lives even though we don’t see each other everyday. I LOVE that!! I’m also lovin’ the fact that I can keep up with people by reading their blogs :)
To fill yall in on what’s been going on in my life:
…A few weeks after my friends and I all got back to school, my friend Katie told me that she didn’t really want to hear about camp or YL. She felt like I didn’t really want to be at school and like I wasn’t really her friend. She told me that she felt that way because most of the pictures in my room are from camp and all my statuses were about missing camp and the friends I made there. Yeah, I talked about camp and YL/College Life a lot, but YL & camp has been a HUGE part of my life since my freshman year of high school. I met the Lord at Lake Champion the summer after my freshman year and have had so many great experiences as a camper as well as on Work Crew and Summer Staff. I don’t know how to not talk about it. I left the conversation with Katie feeling extremely discouraged. I felt like I had to hide who I am in the Lord from her.
A few days later, I was at dinner with Katie and she told me she stumbled across my blog. I was so excited to hear this because I had been writing about all the things the Lord did in my life over Summer Staff, how He was blessing me after camp, and all the things He was teaching me. The only comment she made about my blog was that it was “uhh… interesting…”. As if the first conversation with her didn’t discourage me enough. I was feeling lonelier than ever and the situation only made me miss Summer Staff even more. I didn’t have the fellowship that I needed so desperately during this whole situation.
A few days after all of this went down, I was asked to join the College Life leadership team. At first I was unsure of whether or not I should join because of what Katie and the rest of my friends would think. In my moment of doubt, the Lord reassured me that my identity is not found in my friends, it’s found in Him. I knew the Lord had opened a door and a great opportunity to reach out to my friends by being asked to join, but honestly, the thought of being a leader for people my age scared me to death. After seeking the Lord and listening to His voice, I knew what I needed to do so I joined the leadership team.
I’ve been amazed at how the Lord is working in my life and how He’s been using me to reach out to my friends. He’s given me a boldness I’ve never had before. Ever since the situation with my friend Katie, I have been praying for her like a maniac. Praying that the Lord would keep tugging at her heart (because whether she knows it or not, the Lord has been working in her life) and praying that she’d come out to Club. About 2 weeks ago, Katie and I were coming back from lunch and as we pulled onto campus she told me that she wanted to start going to church again and wanted to come out to Club. Hard circumstances and all the brokenness in her life pushed her away from the Lord. She told me that she had been watching me and really wanted to come out to College Life because of me. I was SO excited to hear this! It was a good thing we were having Club a few days later and so I invited her out.
Last Wednesday night, the night we were having our last Club before Fall Break, rolled around and in walked Katie! I was filled with so many emotions; happy, nervous, joyful, etc. I was excited because she finally came out and I was beyond nervous at the same time. As I watched her enter the room, I could tell she was not sure what to expect and could tell she felt a little out of place. I watched her as Club started. She was smiling and singing along to the songs we were singing, she laughed during the skits, and her eyes & ears were fixed on my co-leader, Andrew, as he was giving the talk that night. After Club, and as we were walking out the door, Katie told me what a great time she had and how she wants to go on Fall Retreat!! WOW. The Lord is amazing!!!!
I would’ve never imagined being a Young Life College leader in a million years because I was so stuck on being a WyldLife or Young Life leader, but the Lord placed me where He wants me. Being able to do campus ministry is SO great. I’m in awe of the Lord’s faithfulness, love, grace, joy, and goodness. With God all things are possible.
“You have my heart and I am Yours forever. How beautiful is Your unfailing love.”
I love that I can just pick up the phone or skype to chat with people I haven’t seen in about 3-4 months and pick up where we left off. Even though we’re all home and busy with school, leading, and life, when we talk it’s like we haven’t skipped a beat. We’re still able to share with each other all the things that the Lord is doing in our lives after camp, we’re still able to encourage each other, and we’re still able to pour into each other lives even though we don’t see each other everyday. I LOVE that!! I’m also lovin’ the fact that I can keep up with people by reading their blogs :)
To fill yall in on what’s been going on in my life:
…A few weeks after my friends and I all got back to school, my friend Katie told me that she didn’t really want to hear about camp or YL. She felt like I didn’t really want to be at school and like I wasn’t really her friend. She told me that she felt that way because most of the pictures in my room are from camp and all my statuses were about missing camp and the friends I made there. Yeah, I talked about camp and YL/College Life a lot, but YL & camp has been a HUGE part of my life since my freshman year of high school. I met the Lord at Lake Champion the summer after my freshman year and have had so many great experiences as a camper as well as on Work Crew and Summer Staff. I don’t know how to not talk about it. I left the conversation with Katie feeling extremely discouraged. I felt like I had to hide who I am in the Lord from her.
A few days later, I was at dinner with Katie and she told me she stumbled across my blog. I was so excited to hear this because I had been writing about all the things the Lord did in my life over Summer Staff, how He was blessing me after camp, and all the things He was teaching me. The only comment she made about my blog was that it was “uhh… interesting…”. As if the first conversation with her didn’t discourage me enough. I was feeling lonelier than ever and the situation only made me miss Summer Staff even more. I didn’t have the fellowship that I needed so desperately during this whole situation.
A few days after all of this went down, I was asked to join the College Life leadership team. At first I was unsure of whether or not I should join because of what Katie and the rest of my friends would think. In my moment of doubt, the Lord reassured me that my identity is not found in my friends, it’s found in Him. I knew the Lord had opened a door and a great opportunity to reach out to my friends by being asked to join, but honestly, the thought of being a leader for people my age scared me to death. After seeking the Lord and listening to His voice, I knew what I needed to do so I joined the leadership team.
I’ve been amazed at how the Lord is working in my life and how He’s been using me to reach out to my friends. He’s given me a boldness I’ve never had before. Ever since the situation with my friend Katie, I have been praying for her like a maniac. Praying that the Lord would keep tugging at her heart (because whether she knows it or not, the Lord has been working in her life) and praying that she’d come out to Club. About 2 weeks ago, Katie and I were coming back from lunch and as we pulled onto campus she told me that she wanted to start going to church again and wanted to come out to Club. Hard circumstances and all the brokenness in her life pushed her away from the Lord. She told me that she had been watching me and really wanted to come out to College Life because of me. I was SO excited to hear this! It was a good thing we were having Club a few days later and so I invited her out.
Last Wednesday night, the night we were having our last Club before Fall Break, rolled around and in walked Katie! I was filled with so many emotions; happy, nervous, joyful, etc. I was excited because she finally came out and I was beyond nervous at the same time. As I watched her enter the room, I could tell she was not sure what to expect and could tell she felt a little out of place. I watched her as Club started. She was smiling and singing along to the songs we were singing, she laughed during the skits, and her eyes & ears were fixed on my co-leader, Andrew, as he was giving the talk that night. After Club, and as we were walking out the door, Katie told me what a great time she had and how she wants to go on Fall Retreat!! WOW. The Lord is amazing!!!!
I would’ve never imagined being a Young Life College leader in a million years because I was so stuck on being a WyldLife or Young Life leader, but the Lord placed me where He wants me. Being able to do campus ministry is SO great. I’m in awe of the Lord’s faithfulness, love, grace, joy, and goodness. With God all things are possible.
Jennilyn 101.
I love fall. I love Pumpkin Spice Lattes. I love laughing and I do it often. I prefer the mountains over the beach and lakes over the ocean. I love looking at the stars at night. I love scary movies. One day I want to be a pilot. Towels fresh out of the dryer are the best. My family is amazing and I love them. I want to go on full-time Young Life Staff when I graduate. I am deeply in love with the Creator of the universe. I love sending and receiving snail mail. Most of my closest friends live far away from me. I love doing things for people for no reason, it makes me happy. I love daisies. I want to live in Africa at some point in my life. I tell people I don’t want to get married because I’m afraid it will never happen, but I dream about getting married often. I secretly wish I was from the South. I love oversized tshirts. I love swings. I am obsessed with Anthropologie and Patagonia. I’m probably the only person in NJ who wears Chacos. Glee is my favorite music to listen to during long road trips. I love responsibility, it makes me work harder. I compare myself to everyone and I’m way too hard on myself. My parents are my biggest fans. Being at school has made me realize how much I love my brothers. I listen to music constantly. It doesn’t take much to make my day. I love honest conversations. Summer Staff was the best experience of my life. I am falling more in love with the Lord everyday. I hate odd numbers. I love singing along to the music at the top of my lungs when I drive. I wish I would’ve stuck with one sport instead of trying new ones every few years. I don’t have one thing that I’m really good at. I want to compete in a triathlon. I am captivated by the thought that the Lord calls me His beloved. I love the smell of bonfires. I am passionate. I’m extremely self conscious. I want to adopt. I have a serious shopping addiction, just ask my parents. I wish I was more free spirited. Reading relaxes me. I am obsessed with pictures. I have a tattoo. I miss my friend Brittany more than words can express. I love driving with the windows down with the wind blowing in my face. Serving gives me great joy. I love listening to the rain and thunderstorms, they show me just how mighty God can be and yet He loves me so gently. I love the way the sky looks when the sun sets. I love fireworks on the 4th of July and picnics in the park. I’m a simple girl. Finding money in a jacket from the last time it was worn is the best. I love cozy coffee shops. Having someone brush/play with my hair is the best feeling in the world. I love hugs and snuggling.
“In our world of loneliness and despair, there is an enormous need for men and women who know the heart of God, a heart that forgives, cares, reaches out and wants to heal. In that heart there is no suspicion, no vindictiveness, no resentment, and not a tinge of hatred. It is a heart that wants only to give love and receive love in response. It is a heart that suffers immensely because it sees the magnitude of human pain and the great resistance to trusting the God who wants to offer consolation and hope.
The Christian leader of the future is the one who truly knows the heart of God as it has become flesh, “a heart of flesh,” in Jesus. Knowing God’s heart means consistently, radically, and very concretely to announce and reveal that God is love and only love… but very few people know that they are loved without any conditions or limits.”
-In the Name of Jesus by Henri Nouwen
Lord, allow me to know Your heart so I can reach out to the ones at HPU who are broken, wounded, and searching. Give me Your eyes and guide me to those people, Lord. Let my heart be after Yours always and allow me to love others with Your love. Allow me to bring hope and new life to everywhere I go.
(a few of my College Life co-leaders)
We love because he first loved us. [1 John 4:19]
The Christian leader of the future is the one who truly knows the heart of God as it has become flesh, “a heart of flesh,” in Jesus. Knowing God’s heart means consistently, radically, and very concretely to announce and reveal that God is love and only love… but very few people know that they are loved without any conditions or limits.”
-In the Name of Jesus by Henri Nouwen
Lord, allow me to know Your heart so I can reach out to the ones at HPU who are broken, wounded, and searching. Give me Your eyes and guide me to those people, Lord. Let my heart be after Yours always and allow me to love others with Your love. Allow me to bring hope and new life to everywhere I go.
(a few of my College Life co-leaders)
We love because he first loved us. [1 John 4:19]
The Lord has given me a deep love for ministry and a passion for reaching the lost. A passion for Young Life and for meeting teens right where they are; looking for love in all the wrong places, desperately seeking identity based on friends and reputation, enslaved by drugs and alcohol, broken by hard circumstances, and seeking love by things in this world that can not love them back or fulfill them. My heart has a burden on it for these teens and I want to be there among all of these things. I want to be a light in a dark world. I want to shine forth the Lord’s love, His grace, His hope, and His truth. It’s blowing my mind that He is calling me, of all people, to this ministry. But I’m ready to answer His call for my life. He has positioned me to shine forth His truth and I just want to tell them about the love of Christ and how fulfilling life with Christ is. I will not stop reaching out to people until they realize they are not alone and are changed for eternity. Here I am Lord, use me.
I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. [John 10:10]
I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. [John 10:10]
So good
[Psalm 143:8-10]
⁸ “Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.
⁹ Rescue me from my enemies, O LORD,
for I hide myself in you.
¹⁰ Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God;
may your good spirit
lead me on level ground.”
⁸ “Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.
⁹ Rescue me from my enemies, O LORD,
for I hide myself in you.
¹⁰ Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God;
may your good spirit
lead me on level ground.”
Jesus, I need to give myself up. I am not strong enough to love You and walk with You on my own. I can’t do it, and I need You. I need You deeply and desperately. I believe Your are worth it, that You are better than anything else I could have in this life or the next. I want You. And when I don’t, I want to want You. Be all in me. Take all of me. Have Your way with me. Amen.
Prayer from Crazy Love. So good. Reading it again for the 3rd time and still learning new things. Love it.
Prayer from Crazy Love. So good. Reading it again for the 3rd time and still learning new things. Love it.
I want to be beautiful
Why do I spend so much time comparing myself to everyone I see? Why do I always feel the need to try and "better" myself for people? I judge myself based on how I look and feel. If I like what I see in the mirror, I feel more worthy to be loved by others & more worthy of the Lord's love. When things are going well and when I feel my performance is adequate, I find it easier to accept love and be loved. But when I feel discouraged, I look inward to fix whatever is wrong. Lately, I haven't been feeling worthy of love. Love from my friends and from the Lord. I don't want to keep wasting my time counting calories or trying to figure out ways to change myself. I don't want waste my life worrying about the numbers on a scale. I just want to love myself. I've wasted so much time beating myself up when I could be praising the One who made me with such care. Instead of using my energy to judge myself, I need to redirect it into praising the Lord who made me radiant in His perfect love. I am His masterpiece and I am beautifully and wonderfully made. I am loved perfectly and constantly by the God of the universe.
"I want to be beautiful, make You stand in awe.
Look inside my heart and be amazed.
I want to hear You say, who I am is quite enough.
Just want to be worthy of love and beautiful.
Sometimes I wish I was someone other than me.
Fighting to make the mirror happy.
Trying to find whatever is missing.
Won't you help me back to glory?
You make me beautiful, You make me stand in awe.
You step inside my heart and I am amazed.
I love to hear you say who I am is quite enough.
You make me worthy of love and beautiful."
-Beautiful by Bethany Dillon
"I want to be beautiful, make You stand in awe.
Look inside my heart and be amazed.
I want to hear You say, who I am is quite enough.
Just want to be worthy of love and beautiful.
Sometimes I wish I was someone other than me.
Fighting to make the mirror happy.
Trying to find whatever is missing.
Won't you help me back to glory?
You make me beautiful, You make me stand in awe.
You step inside my heart and I am amazed.
I love to hear you say who I am is quite enough.
You make me worthy of love and beautiful."
-Beautiful by Bethany Dillon
Encouragement
The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing. [Zephaniah 3:17]
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